Small Blessings Blog

My 40 Day Blessing experience

Jai Ram Kaur Hergo - Thursday, August 22, 2019


My 40 Day Blessing experience 

3 children under 5 and more peaceful and restful than I had ever felt!

Me reading in Foods for Health and Healing, planning what I would like to ask to have cooked for me next :-)

Living in Berlin, when I got pregnant with our third child, I knew that I had to do something radical to help me through the 40 days following birth. The two older children were less than 2 and about 3.5. It had been an intense few years already!

Thank god, by that stage I was immersed in my own yoga practice and also in a community of people who also knew and understood the teachings of Kundalini Yoga on the 40 days following birth. They saw the value for themselves of that time and also the value of offering Seva - selfless service. Plus they cared.

So I put out the call to the community for sevadars to come and help us. 
It took some organising, but in the end we had 3 different women at different times come and stay in a friends' flat just down the road which just happened to be empty for that time and look after me. One of these beautiful sevadars, Petra, is in the picture below. 

It felt luxurious. It felt a touch over the top at first. They cooked for me, cleaned, did washing, delivered and picked up the other kids from their kinderladen, made me endless cups of yogi tea (caffeine-less chai) and were generally wonderful. I quickly got over that feeling of indulgence, however, and lay back and enjoyed it. It was snowing and cold outside and to be inside in this bubble, with my baby and family while I healed and rested, breastfed and ate, was incredible. It felt like what I'd needed to do for years. My whole life perhaps. 


By the time the last sevadar left, I felt so full of beans. I felt ready to be a mother of 3. I was excited for it. Not anxious or overwhelmed. I didn't feel alone. I didn't feel exhausted. I felt energetic, balanced, peaceful and joyful. When I finally ventured out into the world with my small caravan of children, people literally commented on how peaceful and calm I seemed. They couldn't understand it. I knew it was because I had been able to touch into a deep well of peace inside of me and I was just still sitting near that well. And that I was able to take the time to find that because of the service of these sevadars.

Time went on and this peacefulness became a little ruffled. Staying there is the challenge. But I will never forget that. And my daughter Sophia's nervous system - her whole being - is imprinted with this deep peace. 

I also know what it is to feel scared, depressed and disconnected as a new mother. That story goes differently. 

When we nourish mothers we are investing in a lot more than just one woman (though that in itself would be enough). Her state imprints the baby. Her sense of herself a mother is forged there. If we don't value the mothers, what kind of society are we? If we won't bring compassion and care there, where will be bring it?

One woman at a time, one baby and family at a time, we can help to bring more peace, more deep security, to our planet


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